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I’m not a doctor. I actually failed tenth grade Chemistry. Our teacher was named Fen Lewis and I couldn’t understand a damn thing she was saying. Because of our lack of connection through the English language I almost blew up Strongsville High School trying to learn about fractional crystallization. That’s a story for a different time as some people want you to believe that we all need to wear a mask, stay in our house and never go to church again. I’m not saying that there isn’t a Chinese Plague but we all need to use something that can’t be taught in a classroom or from a book; it’s called common sense.

I live in Willoughby, Ohio which is twenty miles east of downtown Cleveland. On Thursday our Governor will decide if he will close bars, restaurants and gyms. Bars are currently open but they must have last call by 10PM and be empty by 11PM. The Plague continues to rise in our state and Governor Harry Potter thinks the lockdown of bars, restaurants and gyms will stop it. Here’s where common sense should come in but it doesn’t since the Governor doesn’t have any. The bars, restaurant workers and owners I know have been abiding by the rules. They have invested thousands of dollars on cleaning supplies and team members that do NOTHING except focus on keeping their location sanitized and spotless. I’m in a high risk group and I feel safer there more than I do at the grocery store or at Walgreens getting my prescription filled. I actually think closing the bars early is the WORST thing you can do.

People love to socialize. People do not like to be told what to do. If you are standing in a bar in Ohio you must wear a mask. When you sit down you can remove it. Evidently scientists have determined the virus will not attack anyone in a chair. Perhaps we should make it mandatory to carry around a bar stool? Just because you give last call at 10PM it doesn’t mean the party is over. House parties are booming and no one is wearing a face mask while they slam dance to hair bands in someone’s basement at an after hours party that starts at 10:30 PM. You can’t control what happens in the privacy of someone’s home so why not keep them outside in a controlled environment? The conditions at any bar or restaurant right now are much better than the bacteria that can found growing in the kitchen sink of neighbor Nick’s after party that looks like a petri dish. We can make sure people are social distancing and still keep the local economy going. Isn’t it time to stop punishing those that are NOT breaking the laws? Like I said at the beginning of this blog….I’m not a scientist…..but I DO have common sense.

Make sure to listen to Danny’s weekly podcast DANNYLAND!!!! Click HERE to listen. 🦾🦾🦾

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Today is a big day if you like to partake in the inhalation of marijuana.  The time of 4:20 PM was singled out as the appropriate time during the day to smoke the wacky weed by an editor of High Times.  Although I don’t smoke pot myself I have in the past and I am a huge advocate of the legalization of marijuana.  Our prisons are filled with people that have consumed and sold something that is legal in some states.  That seems like a silly and huge contradiction to me.

Opponents of the legalization of marijuana will argue that it’s a “gateway drug” that will lead to  experimentation and abuse of other drugs.  Let me set the record straight:  It leads you to the gateway of Pizza and Funions.  Legalization of pot would have a drastic effect on this country.  Video game sales would skyrocket and furniture stores would experience a record amount of sofa and recliner sales.  The police would not be happy as there never would be another speeding ticket written again.  The speed limit on the highways would have to be reduced to 35 miles an hour.  Imagine how much fuel we would conserve.

Legalize weed and your husband will never say to you “There’s nothing to eat in this house.”  He’ll grab an onion, two slices of bread, some chocolate syrup and a can of tuna and proudly proclaim he has discovered “the greatest sandwich in the world!”  The divorce rate would decrease dramatically as your fights would go like this:  SHE:  “Didn’t I tell you yesterday to take out the trash?”  HE:  “I’m not sure.”  SHE:  “Me either.  Where are the Doritoes.”

So if you happen to be driving this afternoon around 4:20PM and it seems like there aren’t a lot of people on the road, don’t worry, they’ll all be at The Golden Corral.