hoa

If you have a good relationship with your HOA then you never speak to them and they never speak to you.  Imagine a world in which you pay $357.82 a month to have no communication.  That’s my world and sadly I have to communicate with my HOA about once a week.  The person in control of my HOA has the name of Mary.  Mary is an idiot.

I like to be left alone.  I don’t need my phone ringing or anyone knocking on my door with a covered dish.  If I want to make friends I’ll go to the bar.  Don’t bother me on my time when I’m not bothering anyone.  Mary bothers me.  Mary is a pain in my ass.

It started the past spring when Mary sent me a letter saying my deck needed to be painted.  Keep in mind I had just moved into my new place the previous fall.  I take pride in where I live and always wish to increase the value in my property.  The deck was on my list but, quite frankly, wasn’t a priority.  I hired a painter to fix the problem and he wasn’t cheap.  He cost me about $1600.  Because of the rain he didn’t get to my project until the end of June.  This illustrated how stupid and vindictive Mary is.  She kept hounding me with calls wanting to know when I was going to have my deck fixed.  I tried to explain to this ass hat that I can’t control the weather and I may have to build a fucking ark and gather up animals by the pair.  This retard still wasn’t able to put together a sentence that is worth repeating.

Let’s fast forward to last week.  The garbage guys toss my can and break it.  I call the number on the can to get a new one.  Number is disconnected.  I say “SHIT!!!!”  I gotta call Mary.  Did I mention she’s an idiot?  I know this won’t go well.  I was right.  I asked for the number of the garbage company and she wouldn’t give it to me.  She said she would fix the problem.  On Tuesday a neighbor showed up at my house.  He looked like the present day Rob Reiner.  He said he was sent to my house by Mary.  He had a garbage can.  How nice right?  The problem was this can was about the size of something you’d have under your kitchen sink. Thanks Meathead….are you trying to help or are you just a prop in this fucking goat show?   Can Mary be that stupid?  Sadly, I believe she is.

I call up Mary and congratulate her on being an idiot and tell her that I’m gonna buy a 64 gallon can at Home Depot and just bill her for the forty bucks.  She tells me I can’t do that and if I do she will place me in collection.  Really?  I told this ass munch “Ya do that and I’ll sue the HOA for harassment and no one will be able to buy or sell in the association until the lawsuit is settled.  Enjoy that forty bucks!!!!”  I’ll let ya know how next week goes my friends.  Thanks for reading and be happy you don’t have a “Mary” in your life.

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It’s a new week and a new podcast.  Danny has a lot of people on his target list.  Joy Behar has lost her mind. 🤪🤪🤪 You’ll hear from Hunter Biden.  Why are they shooting a porn movie in a gas station? The Trump/Pelosi feud gets deeper. 🥊🥊🥊 You’ll hear from Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield and much more. 🦾🦾🦾

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Chinese people are nice people.  Hard working people.  They also eat a lot of weird shit.  Their government lies all the time but that’s what government does.  They don’t help.  They lie.  Having said that I’d keep my eyes on this outbreak of the Corona Virus.  So far 23,500 have been infected resulting in 490 deaths.  Let’s compare that to the flu of 2019.  The Center for Disease Control estimates 42.9 million people were infected, 647,000 people hospitalized and 61,200 people died.  So why worry about the Corona Virus?  Simple.  It started in late December and it’s spreading at an alarming rate.

Now cruise ships are being quarantined and for good reason.  Ya ever been on a cruise?  It is filled with germs, disease, obesity and filth.  It’s gotta be like Happy Hour for any type of virus.  So after eating a bunch of processed food and putting on ten pounds these cruise people come back to port infected with the corona virus.  It’s truly the perfect storm.

If the corona virus started in this country instead of China I wouldn’t be as concerned.  China has never told the truth so why would they start now?  People are dropping dead because some Chinese dude ate some bat soup?  Do ya really believe that?  You don’t think that there is biological warfare out there?  Iran gets pissed at China because they made a trade deal with the United States.  Isn’t that a better possibility than pointing the finger at Fung and his bowl of bat soup?  I’m not saying that is what happened I’m just saying we need to question everything and not let our guard down.  It’s also a good excuse to avoid people…….which I do every day.  See ya in the dungeon.  Thanks for reading.

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Last podcast of the week and Danny wraps it up in less than 20 minutes.  Crazy Super Bowl parade in Kansas City.  The real drama was BEFORE the parade. 🏈🏈🏈The showdown between Donald Trump and Nancy Pelosi. 🥊🥊🥊  Alexandria Orcasio Cortez is getting on Danny’s nerves again and much more!!!🔥🔥🔥

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Danny tears into the weak sauce government that only wastes our time and money. ⚡⚡⚡ Joe Biden has fallen to number three in Democratic Presidential hopefuls and it’s probably because he’s a blatant liar!  Danny explains. 🦾🦾🦾What celebrity had a marriage that lasted only twelve days? 🤘🤘🤘Bad news for a well known radio personality and much more.

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I still am in shock.  I can’t believe what I saw last night.  Nancy Pelosi is a selfish and miserable person.  I understand not liking our President yet he still is the President.  It is a position that demands respect.  By tearing up a copy of the President’s State of the Union speech she was not just being disrespectful she was all about making the moment about her.  She also destroyed a federal document.  This is the person that is the Speaker of the House?

I once acted in a similar fashion except I was six years old and playing in the sandbox with some of the neighborhood kids.  I didn’t like the way they were playing so I grabbed my Tonka trucks and ran home crying to Mommy.  That’s what six year olds do.  When you are seventy-nine years old and the first female Speaker of the House I think the expectations are set a bit higher.  So now what?

Pelosi has put the icing on top of the cake of ruins that is the Democratic Party.  She just didn’t tear up a copy of a speech.  She tore up the names and memories of dead Americans….of TRUE patriots….of TRUE victims.  The only solution to this public relations disaster is for her to step down.  If she doesn’t resign, which I don’t think she will, then it only proves what a narcissist she truly is.  Thanks for reading! 🦾🦾🦾

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Danny makes his BEST funny phone call EVER!!  He calls a body shop in the Bronx asking for “dipshit.” 😁😁😁 Things black guys can do that white guys can’t.  The reason why Taylor Swift is not a nice person. 😈😈😈 Did Browns quarterback Baker Mayfield have a bad season because he got married?  Controversy on Ground Hog’s Day and much more!! 🔥🔥🔥🦾🦾🦾