So i see this article where Lindsay Lohan has encouraged others to start tweeting their dreams.  I don’t know if that is a good idea.  Dreams are in the subconscious for a reason:  If you ever shared these thoughts in the conscious world chances are you’d be taken away by a bunch of guys in white hawking some butterfly nets.

For instance I just woke up from a nap and here are the highlights of my dream.  I was back in high school and late for football practice.  I was forty-eight years old but still trying out for the varsity team.  George Clooney was on the team as well but he wasn’t going to practice.  I tried to run to the practice field but I couldn’t’ because my legs were heavy.  I decided to go to class instead and when I was in the band room It had turned into a pizza parlor and I got an Italian meat ball sub.  All of a sudden I notice the food and beverage director from when I was a bartender at the Holiday Inn was now the principal.  He said I had to leave the school because he knew I was serving the kids drinks.  I went to the student parking lot and couldn’t find my car.  All of a sudden the rent-a-cop turned into a giant cobra and started hissing at me.  It was at this point that I woke up.

Now imagine if I picked up a bull horn and read the above paragraph aloud in the middle of a shopping mall.  How long before ya think I would be weaving baskets out of cooked spaghetti?

The lesson here is simple:  sometimes it’s good to keep your thoughts to yourself.