Cleveland

on

me and dadSixteen years ago today my phone rang in Cleveland and I looked at the caller ID.  It was the neighbor of my father.  I knew what this was about before I even answered…..my father had died at the age of 57.  There is no way to prepare anyone for the feelings you will have when losing a parent.  It’s almost like you become a member of “The Club” where you and the others don’t even have to speak your feelings to know what the other has gone through.

After getting the news I remember looking out the window and thinking: “Why are there cars on the road, why are the banks open, why are people grocery shopping and why are people at work?”  It was a big glass of reality for me.  The time we have here on this planet is undetermined and people suffer the loss of loved ones every day but as far as the planet it’s “business as usual.”

I was thirteen and in the basement with Dad when he gave me the greatest advice ever.  He said “Just remember, no matter what, your parents will be the best friends you ever have.”  Of course being thirteen I knew it all and it didn’t really sink in.  Over the years I have truly found not only those words to ring true but also words that have become more relevant and accurate as the days go by.

I really miss the opportunity to grab the phone in my times of trouble or confusion.  I knew that a helpless situation would be put into proper perspective with a five minute conversation with my father.  Now I’m left to figuring it out by myself and I’m not very good at it.

Dad taught me what it was like to be a man.  A man isn’t someone that lifts a lot of weight, can chop down a tree with four swings of an ax, or someone who has to tell anyone “ I’m a man!”  A true man is one that thinks of others instead of himself, gives of his time without expecting anything in return and isn’t afraid to cry from time to time.  I’m still working on so many things he taught me and I hope to have those lessons learned by the time we meet again.   I love you Dad…and look forward to when we meet again…..I got a lot to tell ya!

on

no dating for meMy last relationship ended 10-23-11.  I told myself that day I was gonna go a year without dating.  That time line is now over three years and counting and I really kind of like it.  I used to be very co-dependant.  I couldn’t even keep up with who I was with or who would be next.  I didn’t really “know me” and, quite frankly, I was wasting the time of a lot of really kind and intelligent women.  I needed to find out about me.  What makes me tick?  What are my faults?  How can I improve?

I’m an only child.  Left the house at 18 and got into radio full-time at 21.  I have lived in Wichita, Grand Rapids, Oklahoma City, Kansas City, Cleveland and now West Palm Beach.  I say what’s on my mind and not necessarily what people wanna hear.  I have a 4 bedroom 2 ½ bath house but have not slept in my bed in over three years.  I sleep on the couch and the TV has to be on 24 hours a day.  The only other rooms I use are the kitchen and my office that has three computers.  I have five televisions in the house.  I am a news and sports junkie.   The only alcohol I drink anymore is beer and that only happens twice a week at the most.  I have a Harley Road King Classic that I have invested 42K on.  I don’t own a suit.  I think my mother is the greatest woman I have ever met–although she does know how to drive me nuts.  As I figure out what to do with the rest of my life I exist in my boxers and my boxers alone.

My psychiatrist tells me I am “the most honest patient he has ever met.”  He has been in practice for 28 years.  I’m pretty sure that’s a compliment.  I’m a Libertarian but I don’t like to argue about politics.  Inform yourself about the issues and THEN go and vote.  I have zero tolerance for stupid voters…actually you can expand that to “stupid people.”  I’m not sure about what religion is “right” but I know there is a Supreme Being.  I don’t mind saying “I really don’t like Pat Robertson.”  I don’t have any children and am amazed and impressed by those that do and do it well.  We all make mistakes but it’s truly the way we ever learn.

So back to why I don’t date…..it has forced me to take a look at myself.  I have learned and changed so much in the past three years I only wish I did it sooner….like maybe when I was ten but I was too involved in climbing trees and playing baseball.

on

clown lebronI’m an idiot.  I have spent the past day listening to sports talk radio in Cleveland and Miami about the Lebron James situation:  which city will he choose to play for?  In the end it really is insignificant based on the fact that Hamas and Israel are bombing the shit out of each other but I am intrigued by the fact that so many people are interested in this and it’s being covered by every single media outlet.

Let’s not forget I am from Cleveland.  I love and miss my hometown.  I have and always will be a fan of all Cleveland sports teams.  LeBron is gonna make nearly $21 million bucks in either city to throw a ball in a basket.  Let’s not forget all the money he’ll make in endorsements.  LeBron is not just a player he is a brand.   So why hold two cities hostage by dragging out your decision?  Simple:  He’s a jackass!

Sociopath, narcissistic, selfish, bratty, punk, jerk, prima-donna…..any of the preceding words would fit but he also is the best basketball player on the planet.  If he returns to Cleveland I will not be cheering for him directly I will be cheering for my team like I do every year.

This country is falling apart, people are out of work, the middle class is disappearing, the Middle East is ready to implode, values and common courtesy towards fellow man are disappearing and I’m concerning myself about basketball player and where he will decide to make his millions.  Like I said….I’m an idiot.